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What Happens When People Impersonate Me [Apr. 28th, 2008|12:12 pm]
MyFursona

myfursona

[xerxesqados]
The following is an unedited blog post that appeared under my name on MyFursona. It was posted by someone exploiting a security bug:

all right, this isn't easy for me but i feel that my personal life should be made known to both my friends and total strangers. if i don't get this off my chest, my life will never be worth living. you MUST know this about me. it's a prereq to be my friend. or to not be my friend. or to not even know me period.

all right, i have a fetish. well, more than just a "fetish". it's an entire sexual lifestyle. an exclusive sexuality that i share with only a few people. i am not weird or sick, there are dozens of us in the world.

okay, i'm not going to beat around the bush any longer. i will come right out and say it.

i have a deep and profound sexual attraction to pinecones. yes, pinecones. now hear me out.... how do you not fuck that?

seriously though folks, it's been like this for years. i can't explain it, it's just who i am. it's not weird by any stretch of the imagination. scientists and psychologists both agree unanimously that humans having sex with pinecones is completely natural and is in no way, shape, or form considered not "normal". i have yet to tell my, as you would say, "irl" friends. if they truly care about me, they will support me and my not-weird sex life.

i like both male and female pinecones. (NOT GAY) you didn't know they had genders did you? well, they sort of don't. i assign them genders in my head. i can look at a pinecone and tell what gender it should be. that's how deep my love for these beautiful creatures goes. i like to tongue them down, then caress their little piney things. i can't really stick my dick in them because they have no real holes. what i do is i rub my cock all over them. it hurts, but in an oh so good way.

none time i got caught in the woods making sweet passionate love and a group of skinheads caught me. they said that i was a freak and then they beat the shit out of me. they then stepped on the pinecone as i lay there battered and bloody. i reported it to the police but they just laughed at me.

why?

am i not human too? just because i'm different than the rest of the world? i deserve a chance for happiness just like everybody else. screw this planet for judging me. one day, i dream that we will live in a world that lets people like me roam the streets at night with out so much as a single thought.

until then, i wait...


---

That's why the site's down again.
LinkReply

Comments:
From: shadown_o
2008-04-28 06:00 pm (UTC)
that is the best excuse on why the site is down ever.
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[User Picture]From: eagle_bird
2008-04-28 06:31 pm (UTC)
fucking awesome me too
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[User Picture]From: monogato
2008-04-28 10:44 pm (UTC)
I've caught myself eying a voluptuous pinecone from time to time...
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[User Picture]From: sebek_shrouder
2008-04-28 11:38 pm (UTC)
Lol. XP Naw, woofies are!
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[User Picture]From: sebek_shrouder
2008-04-28 11:40 pm (UTC)
Its also happened when I was updating my info. O.O
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[User Picture]From: wagtehdog
2008-04-28 11:42 pm (UTC)
I fucking rofl'd
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[User Picture]From: horsinekama
2008-04-29 01:20 am (UTC)
...this is what I have to say about this...LOLZ.
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[User Picture]From: nikolai_miko
2008-04-29 03:15 am (UTC)
hehe, best to fix the error. Funny that someone wrote this though, even though it was, well, unnecessary and a tad immature, though sometimes, you just have to laugh right?
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[User Picture]From: horsinekama
2008-04-29 03:20 am (UTC)
Yes...agreed. I'm sorry that this happened to you. ^^; Let's hope the site will be up soon though.
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[User Picture]From: babsbunny
2008-04-29 03:44 am (UTC)
*standing ovation*
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[User Picture]From: kuroookamitsume
2008-04-29 04:00 am (UTC)

OH GAWD!

LOL, gotta love them cones, ne?

Seriousully, whoever wrote that was a genious. Lol. A weird, twisted...genious.
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[User Picture]From: kovuthehusky
2008-04-29 04:53 am (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: hollud
2008-04-29 11:58 am (UTC)
Don't they make something out of pine cones which is edible?
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[User Picture]From: hiro_judgement
2008-04-29 03:07 pm (UTC)
Oh man, that's so frickin' hot.

PS. This is my fetish.
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[User Picture]From: snowydrakky
2008-04-29 05:56 pm (UTC)
Oh Gods, pinecones, where do I start!

The way they drop from those trees and look at you like "Oh help, I'm fallen and helpess, a meek damsel in distress!" They know you want to fuck them. And they want it too.

Go fuck those pinecones. :O
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From: ninja_wulf
2008-05-01 04:03 am (UTC)
I guess rule 34 is your friend for once. Eh? XD
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[User Picture]From: ljnightlion
2008-05-04 10:39 am (UTC)
Wow, did you guys know that that is a meme that is rollong around on the *chans?
Took me two seconds to figure it out.
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